Red Welcome


Hornersville, Missouri

Home of the famous -- Wicker's Barbecue Sauce, the late "little people"

Major Willie and Mrs. Jennie Ray, and 650 living residents.

It is with a sad heart that I report the death of Barry McFarland. There is information on this page, about Barry's award for his carving of duck calls. You can read his obituary here, which includes details of the services. McDaniel Funeral Service of Kennett is in charge of the arrangements. Visit their Web site to express your condolences and get information on contacting the funeral home. Site

Arguments About Jesus

There are 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:
1. He called everyone brother.
2. He liked Gospel.
3. He didn't get a fair trial.

But then there are 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into His Father's business.
2. He lived at home until he was 33.
3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother was sure He was God.

But then there are 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian:
1. He talked with His hands.
2. He had wine with His meals.
3. He used olive oil.

But then there are 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian:
1. He never cut His hair.
2. He walked around barefoot, or wearing sandles.
3. He started a new religion.

But then there are 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was an American Indian:
1. He was at peace with nature.
2. He ate a lot of fish.
3. He talked about the Great Spirit.

But then there are 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish:
1. He never got married.
2. He was always telling stories.
3. He loved green pastures.

But the most compelling evidence of all - 3 proofs that Jesus was a woman:
1. He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was virtually no food.
2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it.
3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was still work to do!

You Know You Live In The Bootheel of Missouri When:

ball blink - redPeople know more about you than you do;

ball blink - redYou know the gravel and dirt roads better than the paved roads;

ball blink - redA minor can buy beer just about anywhere;

ball blink - redWeekend excitement involves a trip to somewhere farther than an hour away from home;

ball blink - redYour idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway;

ball blink - redYou decide to walk for exercise and five people pull over and ask you if you need a ride;

ball blink - redYou party out in the middle of nowhere;

ball blink - redYou schedule those parties around the schedules of different police officers because you know which ones will bust you;

ball blink - redA cop pulls you over not because your drinking, but to see if you can spare a cold one;

ball blink - redYou would rather go to your high schools rival football game than the Superbowl;

You are a die-hard Cardinals Baseball fan;

You call people an hour away, Yankees;

You see a car and know exactly who is driving and who is with them;

You call, "getting out of town,"going 10 miles just to ride around a bit;

Almost all your guy friends chew tobacco;

The mosquitos in your yard out number the people in the USA;

People keep their chistmas lights up all year long;

You get married, hit a home run/make a touchdown, or have a traffic accident, and the local newspaper devotes a quarter page to the story;

There's a tornado warning and the whole town is outside watching for it;

No one uses turn signals, and everyone knows where they're going, anyway;

You measure distance in minutes.

You hang out at Walmart;

The only thing that matters about your truck is how fast and loud it is, and ITS GOTTA BE A CHEVY!!!